Thinking Through my Keyboard
Today’s Tuesday Trying was inspired by a Twitter conversation. If you’re on twitter you might have seen an exchange between a woman who claimed that the Megalodon was still in existence and a whole bunch of marine scientists who said ‘uhh…not so much’. What hooked me was her claim that the existence of the Megalodon was known but hushed up because otherwise the government would experiment on them ‘just like the mermaids’.
That’s right. Continue reading “Tuesday Trying – a Mermaid Conspiracy”
“Come on Mr Frodo, I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you!”
Such a great moment. I cry every time.
If you’ve seen the movie or read the book, you will recognise this as the moment that Sam picks up Frodo and carries him towards the entrance to Mt Doom. Frodo had told Sam earlier that the ring “is such a weight to carry, such a weight’. But when Sam had offered to carry it for him he said “You must understand, it is my burden, and no one else can bear it“. All through the story there are these two ideas that seem to be in competition but really aren’t. Continue reading “We can’t do it alone – lessons from Frodo and Sam”
Kate: It’s a nice red wine
Luc: I think you can do better.
Kate: A bold wine with a hint of sophistication and lacking in pretension. Actually I was just talking about myself.
Luc: No you’re not wrong. Wine is like people. The vine takes all the influences in life all around it. It absorbs them and it gets its personality.
– French Kiss
So I’ve seen this movie so many times, but I’ve always just nodded and smiled at this part. This time, possibly because I’ve been thinking about cultural baggage and how we form our identities, it really struck me. People are like wine.
We take on a host of influences we don’t even think about: the air, the ground, the other plants (people) near us.
These influences shape our perception of who we are, they mould our values. Either because we don’t see anything better or we form our ideals in direct opposition to what we see around us. What your parents believe, what your school taught you, whether you are religious or not, the ads that were on TV when you grew up, the advent of social media and globalisation, all have a huge impact on who you are. But I think we are like wine in other ways too.
Okay, most of us age well. Some of us are perhaps a little corked and nasty and need to be quietly got rid of down the sink. Some are sharper and more vibrant in their youth but mellow to a gentle easy drink later in life. But I believe most of us are like quality wine – we grow into ourselves, our flavours, our sharp notes, our mellow undertones, as we age. I’m certainly a lot smarter and more confident than I ever was in my early 20s. So if you’re heading to the shady side of whatever decade you’re currently struggling through, just remember – you’re vintage, not old.
Some people prefer the sweet dessert wines while others find them cloying. Some go for the oaky notes of a chardonnay as others screw up their noses and proclaim loudly that they only drink red. When we’re younger we desperately want to be the wine that everybody likes, that everybody can drink, forgetting that our current taste is for Miami Wine Cooler and we will quickly pass that stage. Ahem. Or was that just me? It’s okay to be not be the preferred choice of everybody. And as you get older you realise that actually most people pretend to like champagne even when they’d rather be drinking cider. I’d certainly rather be someone’s genuine choice than one because it was seen to be the thing.
The ‘happy drunk’, the ‘crying drunk’. I’ve always thought that wine simply intensified the feelings that I had right at that moment. We can’t create feelings in other people – they have ownership of that – but, just like the wine, we can be the person who brings joy and happiness to others, the person who starts the dancing off because no-one wants to be the first on the dance floor but if you’re brave enough, everyone will follow. Especially if the DJ is playing ABBA or Michael Jackson. True story. You can be the person to lift others, to showcase their humour and their good looks with your admiration and support – wine goggles aren’t needed when you’re there.
Or, we can be the person who brings others down. Who reminds them of what they’ve not got, who points out that their jokes aren’t funny and their clothes don’t fit properly. Actually, I can’t imagine being that person but I have met people who are. They are the human equivalent of wine making someone a sad drunk. Don’t do that. Be the happy bringer.
If we’re supportive and encouraging enough, we can help others find their bravery. We can prompt them to approach the person they’ve been dying to talk to, we can motivate them to try things they’ve never done before. And, more importantly, if we create a space that’s safe and loving, they will be brave enough to tell us the things they’ve never told anyone else but desperately need to tell.
Okay no, we can’t.
Sorry. That’s beyond my powers.
Brand recognition goes a long way. I’ve heard of many blind taste tests where the cheaper bottle won, or they were all the same and people thought they were different. Because people’s preferences differ, the veuve clicquot may lose out to the local methode champenoise more often than not. As a society we kind of buy into the whole sham of beauty and glamour and fame and wealth somehow indicating a superiority. Yet we know it doesn’t. Who you are, your influences that shaped you, your full-bodiedness or your gentle spiciness, it’s all good. You don’t need a medal and a shocking price tag to know it.
So next time you raise a glass, think of all the things that went into making you who you are, and the kind of flavours, body, inspiration, that you bring to the world.
Expectations. That kind of sums up the whole New Year’s thing for me.
Expectations that even if you’re more than happy curling up on the sofa waiting for the New Year to tick over, you SHOULD be out somewhere having EXTRAORDINARY fun. Camping. At a festival. A concert at an exclusive bar (as opposed to that seedy one with terrible music that you doggedly stick it out in because damn it it’s nearly midnight and you queued for 40 minutes just to get in). Continue reading “New Year’s dilemmas and expectations and what I do about them.”
The first page of results for images of reality was people looking through virtual reality glasses. I find it fascinating that, to a large extent, our concept of reality is filtered through what we think is better, or conversely what we think is worse. Is what they’re seeing through the glasses the true reality? The people exist, in these images, without a context, without a grounding reality.
What makes something real? Is it something that we touch? What about those motion master rides that make you truly feel like you’re racing through the stars and you duck when the 3D spaceship shoots out at you from the screen? That always feels pretty real even though we know it isn’t. Continue reading “The Reality we Create”