self efficacy – Clementine Fraser

daisies in concrete

Resilience. The ability to tap into an inner core of strength and keep going. To bounce back. There are a plethora of great quotes on resilience. They centre on the idea of persisting despite failure, of overcoming obstacles through sheer tenacity and willpower, of rising to the challenge. About choosing to be strong (which, in itself, is an act of strength).

This is a really important skill and something I think we’re not really helping our young people develop. I look at the changes in the student cohorts I’ve taught over the last 11 years. There’s been a big shift in their (outward) resilience. I see increased anxiety, apathy, a belief that if you don’t succeed the first time you’re just rubbish at it, a tendency to become overwhelmed at the workload and social pressures. Resilience is needed and I don’t think they’ve been helped to develop it in the system that we provide. Continue reading “Resilience – or, bouncing back like Tigger” →

Biggest son when he was smaller, in a moment of joy.

Happiness is something we are all supposed to be striving for and when we don’t feel it we wonder how we can catch it, pin it down, keep it.

I think it is useful to differentiate between happiness and joy. Sometimes we can be quiet happy when other times it’s bubbles of joy floating through us. When I was looking up images for happiness on Shutterstock it seemed to be mostly photos of people with arms wide open, faces to the sky. Happiness as an open feeling is something I can connect to. It can be a giant feeling. But sometimes happiness is a quiet secret moment, a gentle glow. And happiness looks and feels different to different people.

Something I hear a lot is: ‘you’re such a positive person! how do you stay so happy all the time!”. The big secret is that I don’t. No-one can really maintain a high level of positivity constantly (if you can – get in touch and tell me how!). Like motivation, positivity and happiness need fuel – you have to put stuff in to get stuff out. I’m not always good at it either, but when I actively chase the happiness, usually I can catch it. Continue reading “Happiness – how I try and catch it” →